Sen. Rand Paul made his usual lap around Fox News programs last week, declaring his square GOP colleagues are close to turning his party into a dinosaur with their stodgy white orthodoxy. While we’ll tip our cap to Paul’s call for liberalizing drug laws, we can’t take such words seriously from a man who wants to criminalize abortion on the federal level, even in cases of rape, not to mention that whole Civil Rights Act thing.

What would it take for Charlie Strong to piss off his devoted flock of Cards football faithful? Answer: insulting fans, lauding Big Blue Nation, and refusing to say whether he plans to remain at U of L. But given Strong’s press conference train wreck came on the heels of wrapping up a 10-2 season that ended with a spot in the Sugar Bowl, fans will likely forgive and forget.

It seems city lawmakers from both parties find Mayor Fischer’s plan to hire a new director for violence prevention wasteful, unnecessary, and a bureaucratic response to a complex problem. Councilman Kelly Downard (R-16) told WFPL: “The whole job description sounds like it was written by somebody who just wanted to use adjectives, but not any concrete experience.” Meanwhile, Attica Scott (D-1) believes more street-level outreach must occur. Bickering over violence prevention. Oh, the irony …

Telenut Pat Robertson took a week off from blaming gay people for hurricanes and tornado victims for not praying hard enough to say something considerably less insane: The earth is much more than 6,000 years old, and “The Flintstones” wasn’t a documentary. Fortunately, this means Robertson isn’t crazy enough for Gov. Beshear to give him $43 million in tax breaks to build an ark.